On Being Liked
I recently learned that someone hates me. I mean, this person told me, in no uncertain terms, to go to hell because they hate me. I’m fairly sure this isn’t the first person who’s ever hated me, but it’s the first time I know it without doubt. My initial reaction upon receiving this information was to think, “Uh-oh, I’ve got to fix this!” I thought I needed to disabuse this person of their erroneous opinion of me, outline to them my upright and admirable characteristics, set the record straight, as it were. Then a little voice reminded me of a quote from author and psychotherapist Judy Ford: “Your opinion of me is none of my business.” The message of hate played on a loop in my head for a day or two, interrupted now and then by Ford’s quote. I really had to chew on the two of them together for the idea to sink in and take hold. I’ve never been a firm believer in intention. I always prize action over intention because having a thought doesn’t necessarily do anythin...